....but i'm not

Monday, October 15, 2012

My Heroes.

I've been hearing a lot of buzz about these "inspiration boards" where people build a visual depiction of who they aspire to become, or who inspires their style or how they want to paint their kitchen.  Well I have one too.  My inspiration board is more of a "If she was a vessel for the miracle of life, I sure as hell can be too."

Here are my influences for the history books:

#1.  Snooki

#2.  Jay Cutler and Kristin Cavallari (Inspirational Couple of the Year...in this context)

#3. Rachel Zoe - only because it always looks like she's carrying a hot potato instead of her baby, but I'm sure the kid'll turn out fine.

#5.  Any Kardashian.  From now until the end of time.

#6.   Mariah Carey - twice.

#7.  Martha Stewart.

#8.  Keith Richards' mom.

#9.  The Trumps.

#10.  Obviously J Lo.

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Lots O' Firsts

Sunday was a day of many "firsts" for me:

It was the first time I ran 26.2 miles.
It was the first time I won a medal for something that didn't involve me spelling anything.
It was the first time I used a port-o-potty 7 times in one day and still managed to pee my shorts a little.
It was the first (and last) time I used a port-o-potty 7 times in one day.
It was the first time I ate four pretzels and a banana out of some lady's Tupperware in Chinatown.

But the biggest and most exciting of those firsts was that I did all of it with a 12 week old baby in my belly! 


The other half of you are probably thinking "HOW did she become pregnant?"  And I'm 100% ok with explaining it to you but just know that it starts off with "When a man loves a woman..." and if you are anything like me when I was 10 and first heard those words, you will run out of the room bawling hysterically.

So heads up for a few more firsts coming your way in the next few months.  SPOILER ALERT:  The first time I fit into a B cup.  The first time I look down and see cankles where my ankles used to be.  The first time I shoot milk out of my boobs...the usual deeply analytical and educational material I assume you get from these posts.