....but i'm not

Thursday, August 21, 2014

Stranger Danger

Nothin' makes you feel more pedophile-y than having some mom holler "STRANGER DANGER" over and over and over again to her oblivious 5 year old as said 5 year old chats you up about her new baby sister while you push your smiley 15 month old on a swing.  Seriously lady.  Like I need more chaos in my house to the point that I'm going to kidnap your chatty kid and add to the collection?  Wishful thinking.

But that's not the best part.  The best part is that while walking over to remove her kid from the obvious threat that a mom like me clearly poses, she huffs about "wasting all that money on those stranger danger classes!" And then I didn't even feel creepy anymore because I started thinking about what goes on in Stranger Danger class and clearly the person who teaches that has to be the creep of all creeps.

But that's actually not the best part.  The best part was as I'm heading out of the park her 5 year old daughter says "Mom, you know why I talk to strangers?"  all snooty.