....but i'm not

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

B-Banana-B-B-Banana

You know all those splendid memories you have of high school, some might call them the glory days, others might call them paradise. Perfect skin, smokin bod, flowing locks...really, if you could just picture the epitome of grace and then picture the exact opposite of that, you've got me. I had four growth spurts that eventually added up to 6'1" of woman...one in the 4th grade, one in the 7th, another in the 9th and one perfectly timed inch added my freshman year of college. I didn't have a Pink Locker Society to tell me what the trouble with wearing see through shirts was, I had a Justin who was probably more than happy to tell me what that trouble was, and then tell everyone else.

I kid, because high school was actually great despite my abnormally large wingspan, but the older I get, I realize that in the twitch of an eye, the most awkward high school memories can come flooding back to you when you least expect. Like today, when eating a banana on the train I had a pretty freakin mortifying flashback of a banana peel and me.

I remember it so well: Feeling pretty good, probably just totally rocked my clarinet playing skills, maybe aced another "Great Gatsby" exam, definitely got a wink from that guy...cruising the halls on my way to lunch, I round the corner (the same corner I had rounded 837 times before) and before I could even hold the loser L up to my forehead, land really hard on the ole caboose. Okay now picture Matt Damon, Ben Affleck, Orlando Bloom, Patrick Dempsey, and Andy Roddick eating paper-bagged lunches together in the cafeteria. Yeah, I fell in front of Salem Central's 12th grade equivalent.

From then on, I knew I was different.

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