....but i'm not

Friday, May 21, 2010

The Stuff Rap Stars are Made of, Rap Snacks Duh.

All these years I've spent trying to figure out the key to rapping (you know the countless nights I've spent laying in bed trying to figure out how to replicate that robotic sound Kanye has in 808s and Heartbreaks). Well hold on to your low-riders and put away the cough medicine Weezy, I think I finally found the "magic stuff" on the Blue Line yesterday.

Two words: Rap Snacks.

How could I miss this little gem of an empty wrapper what with those pearly whites of Romeo (formarly known as Lil Romeo pre-voice change) shining back at me from the floor?


Hey Romeo, way to sex it up a bit, turns out I would like to try your flaming bbq HONEY sauced chips...but only if it makes me rap, change outfits, and play basketball like this.


In reality, little finds like this make me pretty bitter. Chips that make you rap better? I totally could have thought of that. What's next? Mysterious juices that make you play sports better? Ridiculous.


I kid, but Rap Snacks actually serve to benefit society. Besides what I'm sure are extremely healthy ingredients, each bag features positive messages for young hip-hop dreamers like "stay in school," "don't sell drugs," "respect your elders." But there seems to be one important lesson missing on these chips, oh I don't know, maybe "don't litter"??

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