See What Happens When You Read? Heartbreak.

I have been told that the best way to improve one's writing is to read the works of others...and to read everything from newspaper articles to essays to novels to prescription drug labels to the Bible.

I believe this to be true but there is one tiny issue - I'm incapable of staying awake for anything longer than two pages of written word. Which is why when I found an author who kept me engaged through an entire commute home plus an extra 5 minutes after I climbed in to bed, I knew it was the beginning of something special.

Meet Sloane Crosley, age 20-something who writes hilarious essays about the experience of 20-somethings (her backdrop is NYC but I think it could really be any urban area). This is obviously not a new subject but she writes with enough detail and perception that a fellow weirdo like me can really relate to her. The craziest thing is that I can relate and she doesn't even write about vampires.

When her new book titled How Did You Get This Number was released, I assumed she'd be making a signing stop in Chicago because, despite my struggle with reading, turns out others in the city are perfectly capable of reading 300 page novels. But when I checked her site I couldn't find anything about a stop in Chi-town (she's even stopping in Philly where I KNOW people don't read, they couldn't possibly).

So I emailed her publicist and again, my curiosity resulted in more questions than answers:

Dear Ms. Grinch,

I was so excited to see that the tour dates for How Did You Get This Number? were posted to the website but was oh so disappointed to learn that there were no Chicago dates scheduled! I have to believe that my friend Angela and I, two 23-year-old recent college grads doing some serious shattering of the glass ceiling (or at least working on it), are not the only followers of Sloane.

I know it seems like the 2nd city is in the middle of nowhere, but I swear it’s a hidden gem and we’re actually pretty funny here and would LOVE a Sloane appearance at the local Borders or Barnes and Noble (probably Barnes and Noble, it’s cleaner).

Thanks very much for your consideration!

Best,

Jordan

Her response a few days later:

Hi, Jordan –

Sorry for no Chicago! We really tried to make it work for the hardcover – as we love Chicago – but it might be someplace that might be an option for any paperback appearances…

We obviously appreciate your support and please stay tuned to her website for any future appearances.

Best,
Katie

Now I know very little about book publishing and how these tours work, but I do know what my eyes have seen and I'm 100% positive that even here in Chicago we read both hardcover and paperbacks. If it's Barnes and Noble that's being a stick in the mud, she can come sign books on my stoop...I'll even provide the Corona Light and pens.

I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed.